Don't stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed.
When I was a boy the Dead Sea was only sick.
I can't afford to die I'd lose too much money.
Nice to be here? At my age it's nice to be anywhere.
I smoke ten to fifteen cigars a day. At my age I have to hold on to something.
If you live to be one hundred, you've got it made. Very few people die past that age.
You can't help getting older, but you don't have to get old.
Look to the future, because that is where you'll spend the rest of your life.
I'm very pleased to be here. Let's face it, at my age I'm very pleased to be anywhere.
Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.
I honestly think it is better to be a failure at something you love than to be a success at something you hate.
Happiness? A good cigar, a good meal, a good cigar and a good woman - or a bad woman it depends on how much happiness you can handle.
I spent a year in that town, one Sunday.
I'm at the age now where just putting my cigar in its holder is a thrill.
Sex at age 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope.
Everything that goes up must come down. But there comes a time when not everything that's down can come up.
At my age flowers scare me.
Retirement at sixty-five is ridiculous. When I was sixty-five I still had pimples.
I look to the future because that's where I'm going to spend the rest of my life.