I always pass on good advice. It is the only thing to do with it. It is never of any use to oneself.
Morality is simply the attitude we adopt towards people whom we personally dislike.
Experience is simply the name we give our mistakes.
I want my food dead. Not sick, not dying, dead.
Men always want to be a woman's first love - women like to be a man's last romance.
To expect the unexpected shows a thoroughly modern intellect.
A little sincerity is a dangerous thing, and a great deal of it is absolutely fatal.
The imagination imitates. It is the critical spirit that creates.
I think that God, in creating man, somewhat overestimated his ability.
The world has grown suspicious of anything that looks like a happily married life.
He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends.
A man can be happy with any woman, as long as he does not love her.
There is only one thing in life worse than being talked about, and that is not being talked about.
The public is wonderfully tolerant. It forgives everything except genius.
Those whom the gods love grow young.
A poet can survive everything but a misprint.
In married life three is company and two none.
Life is far too important a thing ever to talk seriously about.
Every saint has a past and every sinner has a future.
The typewriting machine, when played with expression, is no more annoying than the piano when played by a sister or near relation.
The one charm about marriage is that it makes a life of deception absolutely necessary for both parties.
Anybody can be good in the country. There are no temptations there.
It is absurd to divide people into good and bad. People are either charming or tedious.
Laughter is not at all a bad beginning for a friendship, and it is far the best ending for one.
Patriotism is the virtue of the vicious.
There is nothing in the world like the devotion of a married woman. It is a thing no married man knows anything about.
All women become like their mothers. That is their tragedy. No man does. That's his.
Arguments are extremely vulgar, for everyone in good society holds exactly the same opinion.
I sometimes think that God in creating man somewhat overestimated his ability.
Romance should never begin with sentiment. It should begin with science and end with a settlement.
One can survive everything, nowadays, except death, and live down everything except a good reputation.
An excellent man he has no enemies and none of his friends like him.
How can a woman be expected to be happy with a man who insists on treating her as if she were a perfectly normal human being.
Children begin by loving their parents after a time they judge them rarely, if ever, do they forgive them.
Death and vulgarity are the only two facts in the nineteenth century that one cannot explain away.
A dreamer is one who can only find his way by moonlight, and his punishment is that he sees the dawn before the rest of the world.
Hatred is blind, as well as love.
How marriage ruins a man! It is as demoralizing as cigarettes, and far more expensive.
It is only by not paying one's bills that one can hope to live in the memory of the commercial classes.
Experience is one thing you can't get for nothing.
The salesman knows nothing of what he is selling save that he is charging a great deal too much for it.
Ambition is the last refuge of the failure.
Women love us for our defects. If we have enough of them, they will forgive us everything, even our gigantic intellects.
I put all my genius into my life I put only my talent into my works.
A man's face is his autobiography. A woman's face is her work of fiction.
If one plays good music, people don't listen and if one plays bad music people don't talk.
Women are made to be loved, not understood.
I see when men love women. They give them but a little of their lives. But women when they love give everything.
All bad poetry springs from genuine feeling.
As long as war is regarded as wicked, it will always have its fascination. When it is looked upon as vulgar, it will cease to be popular.
Now that the House of Commons is trying to become useful, it does a great deal of harm.
The good ended happily, and the bad unhappily. That is what fiction means.
Keep love in your heart. A life without it is like a sunless garden when the flowers are dead.
Who, being loved, is poor?
Always forgive your enemies - nothing annoys them so much.
In modern life nothing produces such an effect as a good platitude. It makes the whole world kin.
One's real life is so often the life that one does not lead.
It is better to be beautiful than to be good. But... it is better to be good than to be ugly.
Art is the most intense mode of individualism that the world has known.
It is only an auctioneer who can equally and impartially admire all schools of art.
Education is an admirable thing, but it is well to remember from time to time that nothing that is worth knowing can be taught.
Some cause happiness wherever they go others whenever they go.
The truth is rarely pure and never simple.
Society exists only as a mental concept in the real world there are only individuals.
Man is least himself when he talks in his own person. Give him a mask, and he will tell you the truth.
There is always something ridiculous about the emotions of people whom one has ceased to love.
If you are not too long, I will wait here for you all my life.
Deceiving others. That is what the world calls a romance.
The only thing to do with good advice is to pass it on. It is never of any use to oneself.
I suppose society is wonderfully delightful. To be in it is merely a bore. But to be out of it is simply a tragedy.
I have the simplest tastes. I am always satisfied with the best.
To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance.
There are only two tragedies in life: one is not getting what one wants, and the other is getting it.
Women are never disarmed by compliments. Men always are. That is the difference between the sexes.
Biography lends to death a new terror.
It is a very sad thing that nowadays there is so little useless information.
True friends stab you in the front.
If there was less sympathy in the world, there would be less trouble in the world.
Fathers should be neither seen nor heard. That is the only proper basis for family life.
Life is never fair, and perhaps it is a good thing for most of us that it is not.
All art is quite useless.
When I was young I thought that money was the most important thing in life now that I am old I know that it is.
What we have to do, what at any rate it is our duty to do, is to revive the old art of Lying.
No woman should ever be quite accurate about her age. It looks so calculating.
This suspense is terrible. I hope it will last.
If one could only teach the English how to talk, and the Irish how to listen, society here would be quite civilized.
Between men and women there is no friendship possible. There is passion, enmity, worship, love, but no friendship.
friendship, love, men & women
When a man has once loved a woman he will do anything for her except continue to love her.
When good Americans die they go to Paris.
Work is the curse of the drinking classes.
It is through art, and through art only, that we can realise our perfection.
I never travel without my diary. One should always have something sensational to read in the train.